Advent
Are you ready for some football?
After years of baseball and basketball, we've ventured into the world of football. Ben and Jack got to each play a sport this year and, awesomely for us, they both chose the same sport at the same time! Scheduling win. To ensure even more of a scheduling win, Jimmy volunteered to coach Jack's team so that we could make their practices fall at the same time as Ben's. Any concerns he had about the fact that he actually didn't know a thing about coaching football went out the window on the first practice when it became very clear that the main goal of the season was going to be to keep those little cats herded. That they ended the season with some actual plays and coordinated team effort was a nice surprise. Jack's determined, capable, get-it-done spirit came out in full force this season. His focus on the field cracked us up and he was so quick to figure things out. He made tackles like they were no big thing and even scored his share of touchdowns.
Ben's team was the first team that any of our boys have played on that Jimmy wasn't coaching. He felt a little sad about that at first, but his coach ended up being a long-time friend of our family and he was awesome for Ben. The combination of Brent's desire for the kids to have fun and also grow their skills and better learn the game ended up lighting a fire under our sweet Ben. He's our most cautious and deliberate kid; he's never been in a hurry for a single second in his life. But this football season showed us a side of him we've never seen before. He warmed up slowly, but midway through the season he turned into Mr. Steady, reliably catching passes, quietly making tackles and running like we've never seen him run before. No fanfare, no big deal, just doing the needful. I think he grew up before our eyes.
Ben's team was the first team that any of our boys have played on that Jimmy wasn't coaching. He felt a little sad about that at first, but his coach ended up being a long-time friend of our family and he was awesome for Ben. The combination of Brent's desire for the kids to have fun and also grow their skills and better learn the game ended up lighting a fire under our sweet Ben. He's our most cautious and deliberate kid; he's never been in a hurry for a single second in his life. But this football season showed us a side of him we've never seen before. He warmed up slowly, but midway through the season he turned into Mr. Steady, reliably catching passes, quietly making tackles and running like we've never seen him run before. No fanfare, no big deal, just doing the needful. I think he grew up before our eyes.
O, Christmas Tree!
Thanksgiving
It's become one of my favorite holidays. With the recent explosion of cooking skills in our family, this year made Thanksgiving a sweet week of working together in the kitchen. Travis and Sam were solely in charge of our desserts and provided us with delicious pumpkin pies and ginger-molasses cookies. Caroline was my sous chef doing most of the chopping, stirring and following instructions with her usual cheerfulness. I might have been a little teary watching her make mom's Sweet Potato Casserole all by herself.
Our Thankful Tree was back in full-force. The day I had to cut out more leaves because the kids had run out and still had more things to write was a sweet day. A few friends and most of our family found their way onto the tree several times and Jack was specifically thankful for his "Beautiful Wife". I told him to name it and claim it! We started a new tradition of choosing one thing to write on our tablecloth just before dinner and Eli's gratefulness for Great Granny slayed me. And a few days later when I told her what he chose to write? It slayed her too.
Sadly, family work situations made it impossible for the Howell/Arnolds and dad to join us this year. Change isn't my favorite, and kids growing up and getting real jobs puts a damper on my holidays. :) But our kid table was well represented and the RHB's and Hildreths did their parts to ensure a festive day.
As always, this year finds us overflowing with blessings to count and be grateful for. Even the hard things are making their way onto my list as the Lord shapes my heart to see them for what they are. Charles Surgeon said that he had "learned to kiss the waves that throw me against the Rock of Ages". Our family has had its share of waves in recent years and months, but our gracious God has only tucked us into himself more tightly and repeatedly proven himself to be good. And that's something to be very grateful for.
Our Thankful Tree was back in full-force. The day I had to cut out more leaves because the kids had run out and still had more things to write was a sweet day. A few friends and most of our family found their way onto the tree several times and Jack was specifically thankful for his "Beautiful Wife". I told him to name it and claim it! We started a new tradition of choosing one thing to write on our tablecloth just before dinner and Eli's gratefulness for Great Granny slayed me. And a few days later when I told her what he chose to write? It slayed her too.
Sadly, family work situations made it impossible for the Howell/Arnolds and dad to join us this year. Change isn't my favorite, and kids growing up and getting real jobs puts a damper on my holidays. :) But our kid table was well represented and the RHB's and Hildreths did their parts to ensure a festive day.
As always, this year finds us overflowing with blessings to count and be grateful for. Even the hard things are making their way onto my list as the Lord shapes my heart to see them for what they are. Charles Surgeon said that he had "learned to kiss the waves that throw me against the Rock of Ages". Our family has had its share of waves in recent years and months, but our gracious God has only tucked us into himself more tightly and repeatedly proven himself to be good. And that's something to be very grateful for.
Best Yes
Recently, Jenny-Lynn and I read The Best Yes, by Lysa Terkeurst. The premise of the book is that women are quick to want to please the people around them and quick to want to jump in and help others, often at the expense of their sanity and their effectiveness in the roles they've been specifically given by God. The author had spent many years running herself crazy by saying yes to anything and everything, instead of taking the time to really understand who God has made her and what He has given her to do and then focusing her best efforts towards those things. In my own life, I have seen myself say yes to things that don't work towards fulfilling the goals and purposes of my own family and the end result is always a more frazzled mommy and a rushed and hurried family. Mrs. Terkeurst helped me to see that by saying yes to peripheral extras that only leave me spinning my wheels I'm actually neglecting the very real Best Yes that is the nurturing of my own family.
Now, the temptation for an introvert like myself is to say, "Yay! No more saying "yes" to anything that makes me tired or surrounds me with people for days at a time or anything that I just don't feel like doing!" Actually, maybe that's not an introvert tendency but rather just a selfish human tendency... Regardless, I don't think that's the point at all. Sometimes Best Yesses are going to require a whole lot of work. Sometimes they are going to surround me with a whole bunch of loud, wild, rambunctious middle schoolers. Like, 21 of them. Sometimes they're not going to seem like the funnest, most relaxing way to spend a weekend. But when your family has created a space specifically for gathering people in, and when your kids are getting older and you really, really want to know them and their friends, and when you look down the road and you want your home to be a known gathering spot, then suddenly the Best Yes looks pretty clear.
This weekend we had the pleasure of hosting Redeemer's youth group fall retreat. It was a weekend of feasting, game playing, marshmallow roasting, cocoa drinking, flag capturing, bible studying, praying and all around relationship building. It was loud. It was wild. It was rambunctious. And it was tons of fun. Definitely a Best Yes.
Weekend with the Burtons
We had the joy of another visit with the Burtons and this time I'm happy to report there was no sickness involved at any time. There was, however, some Leaf Sledding (it happened to be our first cold snap and it did feel like there could have been snow on the ground), fire pit building, football playing, picture taking, card playing (with some cow milking) and, of course, good food eating and coffee drinking. All the makings of a lovely weekend, right there.
School pictures
my iPhone, my friend
As technologically illiterate as I am, I have to admit that my laptop and my iPhone proved to be a pretty huge blessing to me this summer. Turns out, regular hum-drum household chores can actually feel like a mini-conference tailored specifically for me with the help of YouTube and kindhearted people who are willing to offer their wisdom for the taking on the internet. So much of what I listened to this summer will need to be listened to again and again so I thought I'd compile a resource list here.
Among my favorite seminars is The Long Haul: On Morning Time, by Cindy Rollins. Mrs. Rollins is a homeschooling mother of nine children (eight boys!), seven having already graduated and moved into adulthood. The two she has remaining are in high school. Her perspective of seeing this thing through from beginning to end (and living to tell about it!) has been a such a gift to me. She speaks about feeling inadequate to prepare her sons for the future she imagined they might have given that her strengths lean so heavily towards the liberal arts and are lighter on math and science. She doesn't negate the importance of those disciplines, but just acknowledges that she struggled with the thought that teaching according to her strengths would prove to be detrimental to her sons education. In fact, as she watched her sons successfully move into very technical fields as adults, fields that she never could have adequately prepared them for if she'd known, she realized that the heavy emphasis on scripture, literature, history and Shakespeare are exactly what trained their minds to think and consider. She didn't teach them everything they might need to ever know, she educated them. She opened their eyes to the feast of wisdom and knowledge that surrounds us all and taught them how to learn. I'm tempted to fear the inevitable "gaps" my children might have in their education due to the inadequacy of their teacher. Mrs. Rollins reminded me that, not only will there certainly be gaps, but that "teaching everything" isn't even a realistic or possible goal in the first place. For any teacher, anywhere. She also reinvigorated my passion for our long-neglected Morning Time, which I'll get to in a later post.
Some other helpful seminars are:
Teaching From a State of What?!
Assessment that Blesses
Teaching Boys and Other Kids Who Would Rather Be Playing in Forts
What Are We Doing to Our Boys?
Teaching From a State of Rest (a six-part series by Andrew Kern)
The Lighter Side of Education: How to Relax, Enjoy and Laugh and Still Be a Parent-Educator
School as Schole (Leisure and Contemplation)
Whose Well-Done Are You Working For?
Nurturing Competent Communicators
These seminars served as such a sweet reminder to me that real education is so much bigger than the "right" curriculum. Really, it's a lifestyle of cultivating beauty and wisdom and virtue in the culture of our family. Which happens to be a whole lot more intimidating, but also so very beautiful and inspiring (and freeing!) at the same time.
Among my favorite seminars is The Long Haul: On Morning Time, by Cindy Rollins. Mrs. Rollins is a homeschooling mother of nine children (eight boys!), seven having already graduated and moved into adulthood. The two she has remaining are in high school. Her perspective of seeing this thing through from beginning to end (and living to tell about it!) has been a such a gift to me. She speaks about feeling inadequate to prepare her sons for the future she imagined they might have given that her strengths lean so heavily towards the liberal arts and are lighter on math and science. She doesn't negate the importance of those disciplines, but just acknowledges that she struggled with the thought that teaching according to her strengths would prove to be detrimental to her sons education. In fact, as she watched her sons successfully move into very technical fields as adults, fields that she never could have adequately prepared them for if she'd known, she realized that the heavy emphasis on scripture, literature, history and Shakespeare are exactly what trained their minds to think and consider. She didn't teach them everything they might need to ever know, she educated them. She opened their eyes to the feast of wisdom and knowledge that surrounds us all and taught them how to learn. I'm tempted to fear the inevitable "gaps" my children might have in their education due to the inadequacy of their teacher. Mrs. Rollins reminded me that, not only will there certainly be gaps, but that "teaching everything" isn't even a realistic or possible goal in the first place. For any teacher, anywhere. She also reinvigorated my passion for our long-neglected Morning Time, which I'll get to in a later post.
Some other helpful seminars are:
Teaching From a State of What?!
Assessment that Blesses
Teaching Boys and Other Kids Who Would Rather Be Playing in Forts
What Are We Doing to Our Boys?
Teaching From a State of Rest (a six-part series by Andrew Kern)
The Lighter Side of Education: How to Relax, Enjoy and Laugh and Still Be a Parent-Educator
School as Schole (Leisure and Contemplation)
Whose Well-Done Are You Working For?
Nurturing Competent Communicators
These seminars served as such a sweet reminder to me that real education is so much bigger than the "right" curriculum. Really, it's a lifestyle of cultivating beauty and wisdom and virtue in the culture of our family. Which happens to be a whole lot more intimidating, but also so very beautiful and inspiring (and freeing!) at the same time.
Hazel Wednesday
This little sweetheart was adopted by friends of ours when she was found abandoned in their neighborhood. They named her Wednesday and she was a fast member of their family. Sadly, their littlest girl proved to be allergic to her and they found themselves needing a new home. Our sweet little Anne had been missing for several weeks and Diana was lonely for her kindred spirit. Sam has also been pushing hard for a pet of his own, so we let him welcome Wednesday into our family. Since we like to give our pets full names, he added Hazel as her first name. And she is a love. Diana didn't accept her as a bosom friend right away, but with a little time and patience they grew to tolerate each other. Her personality is very much like Anne's: playful, spunky and adventurous. And she's even learned to come to call of "Ladies!". She's stolen hearts all over the place and Sam isn't the only one who's smitten with this kitten.
Education is an atmosphere
To say that these past couple of years have been intense for our family would be an understatement. We've felt the impact on all sides and have spent a good portion of this year feeling like we're somewhat in recovery mode. We've stripped our schedule down to bare bones where commitment (aka, leaving our house) is concerned and we've tried to move beyond just surviving, even if our thriving is only happening within our own walls for the time. I think we're finally reaching a place where we can look back on the monumental changes and sorrows and trials and even the wonderfully happy times of the past few years and begin to see the rainbows that were there all along.
Part of our in-house thriving has involved the hosting of many friends and family in our new home. We've already put our basement guest area to good use many times over and we're so thankful for that space! Having a restful, welcoming place for guests to land and recharge is a big part of our family mission. The Lord seems to concur as he's seen fit to keep the front door in a near constant state of revolving since it was hung. :)
But for all the great times we were having with so many guests, I found myself with very little time to prepare for our upcoming school year this summer. I had been so hopeful that this year was going to be a new start for us after a few years of our school not having as much intentionality built into it as I'd like. Three years ago our family made the decision to join a local co-op. We'd never done anything like that and it changed our little school a lot. Two years ago mom died in October. Much of that school year was spent on the bare basics with the added curriculum of learning to grieve well and with hope. We finished that year with me leaving town alone more times than I've ever left my family in order to go and care for my sister after her accident. Last year we had the privilege of building our house. Again, bare bones curriculum with the added adventure of hours upon hours on a job site. On one hand, living these real-life circumstances alongside our children every day is one of the biggest reasons we've chosen this homeschooling path. On the other hand, the researcher/planner in me has a hard time remembering that these experiences are every bit as valuable as the latin program that was being neglected. I was looking forward to some focused time this summer to prepare a school year that would get us back onto the track I had been missing for those three years.
As summers like to do, time was speeding by. I had five official students to prepare for and a schedule to figure out and, quite literally, no white space on the calendar in front of me. It's not pretty, but I'll admit that I began to feel resentful. I heard myself asking God why he would call me to this big task and then not grant me the time I felt like I needed to do it well. I questioned his goodness as more and more opportunities to welcome friends poured in, which meant more time washing sheets, making beds, cleaning bathrooms, preparing menus and making Costco trips and less time in front of the computer researching grammar options. Little did I know, it would be those very chores that would put me in a place to be led to the very things my heart had been craving for our school. In my weary state I had narrowly assumed that the "right track" meant finding the best curriculum for each child and all the best literature and history selections to read aloud. God kindly showed me his goodness by leading me to so much more by giving me those necessary tasks to complete and an iPhone with earbuds to accompany me.
Everywhere I turned in my limited internet time I was being confronted with the reminder to rest; to take my weariness to the Lord instead of to bear up under it even more as I am so apt to do. What surprised me the most was that I found that trend even among my long-time favorite homeschooling bloggers and authors. I don't know if there's actually some sort of Rest Revival going on or whether it's just the theme that God opened my own eyes to, but it was everywhere and I was devouring it. From conference lectures that I could download to podcasts I could subscribe to, my gaze was being shifted from curriculum I could buy to a heart focus on the good and the beautiful feast of learning and it wasn't just limited to my children. I was being reminded that education is so much bigger than math and grammar and science. Our school year was taking on a beautiful shape and I still hadn't spent even a second researching curriculum. And those most wonderful part was that I knew it could be maintained even if this settled, recovered time doesn't last and God sees fit to shake things up again.
We're now five weeks into our school year and I'm finding myself wanting to process and remember these changes we're making. I'm hoping to break things down over this next month and record them here. Words on a page (or screen, I suppose) feel more substantial to me than the thoughts that fly around in my head and writing helps to solidify them in my mind. I've never planned so unofficially before a school year, yet I've never felt so certain that we're on a path towards a rich and beautiful education; an education that is full of real-life living. I don't want to forget the ways in which God heard my grumblings and he answered them with such goodness and compassion.
"Education is an atmosphere, a discipline and a life." ~ Charlotte Mason